Today as I was driving on my way back from class...
a thot suddenly struck me...
When was the year which I have dengue fever?
1992??? 18years ago????
and back then how old was I????
18 years old too???
Life is sooo amazing.....
This year is 2x18 (2 times of my initial life..)
By God's grace....He heard my prayer when I was abt to die of dengue at the age of 18...and extended my life....
My new life started at the age of 18...and I am 18years old of my new (extended life). Isn't it amazing?
Thinking back...
18years ago...I asked God to give me a chance to live again....and extend my life so that I can live as a better christian for him....and have I done so???
Comparing my first 18years of initial life and the 18years of my extended life...Indeed I have....tho...I am still not perfect...
How many more 18years will one has to really live up a good christian life...a life that is pleasing to God???
Its time to ponder...to give thanks for another 18years of blessings...grace...and mercy.....Is this why I am feeling exhausted lately....feeling that my body has started to age???
I guess u must be laughing....at an age of 36...I am not young anymore...of course..bones and knees starts to ache....eye sight starts to get blurry when I see things too near or small.....
Yes, undeniable.. even if I do not look at my actual age...many still thinks that I am below 30s.....Aunty & Uncle still call me xiao mei ....(little girl) when I go to buy food...the body does feel that difference.
I wonder...what will the next 18years of my life be....or will I even live another 18years......Life is so fragile......
Everyday is like a new challenge...
Everyday I juggle and struggle and pray for knowledge, wisdom and strength....
to take on the battle....to conquer each battle of the heart....so as to become a better me....
I used to make a wish that if I can chose the way to die...I wanna die with illness on the bed so that I can spread the gospel....till the last sec I leave this world to meet our Lord in Heaven...
unknowingly..thinking that I may have brain tumor and die....probably because I think alot....
But recently....seeing that a child whom I know...at the age of 2 was suddenly discovered with unoperational brain tumor....
seeing how it hurts the parents...and how everyone ard this child struggle with each day....trying their best to find a solution to prolong his life and make him well...
It really hurts....its exhausting but cannot give up.....until the battle is won...
I start to think...maybe....I should not think of having my life to end that way...
But in whichever way my life will end....I pray that even at the very last breath...I can still witness for the Lord...and share the gospel.....telling them that Jesus love them...and that heaven's gate is open for them...all they have to do is just acknowledge that they are sinners and believe in Jesus that Jesus can save them from their sins by using His precious blood to wash away their sins...They will receive salvation...and I can meet them in heaven one day.
Whatever life maybe...be it for another 18years to live...or many more 18years to go...or 18hrs or 18mins..even 18secs...
I believe that God will never leave me...and will be my Lord forever...till the day I return to Him in heaven...
For as long as my journey on earth...God will renew my strength for each day..and let me battle on...and testify for Him....bear witness for the Lord...
Have you found your direction in life?
Do you know where you are going???
How are u to live each day of your life????
Are you wasting your life away????
Life is precious...live each day as if it is your last day....and live with no regrets.....
Emmanuel!!!!
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